Skip to main content

I Am Not A Victim

A week or so ago, I had an "aha!" moment.  I realized that when it came to taking vacation time at work, I was playing the victim.  I would not take time off when I could, and would say it's because I felt bad that I was leaving work for others to do while I was away.  That point isn't untrue, but I also recognize there's that side of me that was angry that so much seems to fall on my plate.  I was also being prideful, because when I did have the opportunity or was encouraged to take a day off, I would think, "Don't do me any favors!"  Or, "Gee a day off mid-week... Thanks a lot!" 

Ugh.  So bad.  So immature!

I have been angry because I haven't been getting my way.  I started to list all the reasons out, but it's just ridiculous what I wanted, and thought I deserved.

Even though I've been feeling like the victim because one thing or another doesn't seem fair, it in no way means I'm actually a victim. 

Thinking the world is fair, is a child-like way of thinking.  The world isn't fair.  I know this.  I've heard the saying "life isn't fair" a million times over the years.  And yet, I was getting angry, bitter, and thought I was a victim to this cruel, cruel world, forever suffering at the hands of those around me. 

Poor me!  Feel sorry for me!!

Ew.

So, even though it felt unnatural, I blocked some time on the calendar for the end of the month.  Now I just have to figure out what I'm going to do with it!

I realized that I haven't been taking responsibility for my own happiness.  I have no doubt that I'll see more and more ways that I've been playing the victim, and not realizing it.  Even as I write this, I'm starting to see flashes of instances of when I thought I was the victim.  When I thought things should be fair, or should bend to my taste or needs.   

I am not powerless.  Life is not something that is happening to me. 

I actually found this article incredibly helpful.  Albeit, it was a little hard to read.  It was kind of like looking into a mirror.  And, I did not like what was staring back at me.

So now, when I notice my thoughts turn towards a self-victimization way of thinking, I put a stop to it immediately.  I'm not even entertaining those thoughts anymore. 





Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Raise Your Standards

Why Do People Do What They Do?

Last week, I attended a client meeting with several of my co-workers.  During said meeting, one of my co-workers, and good friend, got up to get water for our guests from a mini fridge in a cabinet located in the meeting room.  But, she wasn't really quiet or discrete about it, and proceeded to slam the cabinet doors, while our guests were speaking. Maybe it's because I've lived in an apartment for too long, and the sound of my neighbors slamming their doors and kitchen cabinets has become a big pet peeve of mine.  But, to me, her actions seemed a little rude.  It got me wondering... why do people do some of the things they do? After doing some Googling, it seems like there are many reasons for why people slam things like doors, cabinets, and toilet seats.  Reasons range from anger, lack of awareness, laziness, selfishness, bad manners, and lack of consideration for others.  I immediately did some self-reflection.  While I'm pretty good about not...

Yoga Terminology

I've really been getting into my yoga practices.  Mostly, I believe because I'm trying to not only deepen my practice, but enhance my life through mantras.  (More on that another time.)  Something I'm also trying is to get more involved in things that I'm interested in.  For example, I enjoy yoga.  But, in the past, if someone had asked me to tell them about yoga and practice, I would have told them, "Well... I do a 30 minute at home practice a couple of days a week?"  I think I can go deeper in life, relationships, my thoughts, and my interests.  Hence... I looked up the history of yoga and some common yoga terms that I should be familiar with.   Asanas ("seat") (ah-sahn-ah) : Physical postures of yoga. Chakra: energy center; the basic system has seven chakras (root, sacrum, solar plexus, heart, throat, third eye and crown), each of which is associated with a color, element, syllable, significance, etc. Dharma: truth; the teaching...