Secrets

I hate secrets.  Okay… mostly I hate when things are kept from me.  I have no problem keeping a secret if someone confides in me, and said secret is really no one else's business.

I’ve had an on-going issue with my parents in regards to them remaining friends with my ex-boyfriend and his family after I told them that I don’t like it.  Let me expand upon this and say that my parents have never actually met any of my ex’s family in person, as they live on the other side of the country.  And because of our long-distance relationship, I can count on one hand the number of times that my ex-boyfriend was in the same room with my parents.  But, apparently, I can’t tell my Mother who she can be friends with.  So, she emails and Facebooks.  And, I recently learned they are making the trip across the country to visit them.  

I think what makes me angrier than anything is that it doesn’t make me feel like my parents care about my feelings.  I mean, I have my reasons for cutting ties, and that should be respected.  Right?  Now, because I raise such a stink every time my ex and his family are brought up, my parents communicate with them without telling me.

Anyway…

This situation got me thinking about how often I do things and don’t tell people.  Why?  Because, I don’t want to hear the other persons point of view.  I don’t want to hear how they tell me all the time not to make that same mistake.  I don’t want to hear that I was in the wrong for doing something.  And sometimes, it’s because I want to control the opinions of others.  

This is not the type of person I want to be.  I don’t want disregard another opinion or point of view simply because it goes against what I want.  In many cases, that other person’s point of view is the right one, and I’m going to change what I’m doing because it’s the right thing to do.  I criticize those people that just blatantly do whatever they want because the “world revolves around them.”  But, in a way, this is the same thing.  By keeping these secrets, I’m closing myself off to the real world, and in turn creating my own world, which revolves around my sole point of view.  

Not.  Healthy.