Diary of a Spinster and Lunatic

In my pursuit to find the reason why people seem to have control over my emotions, I came across this article .   Ironically, I think it might also help me answer my question from yesterday’s post!   I’m excited to read the other How to Be Happy articles .      I’ve discovered that the reason I tend to allow others to influence my mood and emotions is because being confronted brings to the surface all of my self-doubts and fears.   My fears cannot hurt me.   They are all in my head.   By allowing my fears to control me, they do nothing but spark anxiety, self-doubt, and I end up imploding and pushing people away.   Now that I’ve identified this, I can put a stop to my behavior.  

First off, I gave up sweets for Lent, excluding my pancakes on Valentine's Day.  And, I'm trying to steer clear of anything that could substitute sweets (aka - soda, frappuccinos, waffles, etc).  We're about what... roughly 2 weeks in, and I want a cookie SO BAD!!  Like, really, really bad. This weekend, I discovered that my problem was not just an addiction to sugar or crazy lady cravings.  I use sweets as a way to make myself feel good.  And, the fact that I can't have them has revealed (quite intensely) that I use sweets much too often to cope for the lack of other things.  Sometimes it's a new eyeliner, clothes, or something for my apartment, but the most frequent way that I try to make myself feel good, is by treating myself to something sweet. While I don't think that copying mechanisms are necessarily a bad thing, I don't want to live my life by leaning on a bunch of crutches.  Because, I can assure you... this is not the only one I have.  There a

I hate secrets.   Okay… mostly I hate when things are kept from me.   I have no problem keeping a secret if someone confides in me, and said secret is really no one else's business. I’ve had an on-going issue with my parents in regards to them remaining friends with my ex-boyfriend and his family after I told them that I don’t like it.   Let me expand upon this and say that my parents have never actually met any of my ex’s family in person, as they live on the other side of the country.   And because of our long-distance relationship, I can count on one hand the number of times that my ex-boyfriend was in the same room with my parents.   But, apparently, I can’t tell my Mother who she can be friends with.   So, she emails and Facebooks.  And, I recently learned they are making the trip across the country to visit them.   I think what makes me angrier than anything is that it doesn’t make me feel like my parents care about my feelings.   I mean, I have my reasons for cutti

And, hello three day weekend! It has been quite a couple of weeks, and I’m very happy to say that work has gradually started to turn from completely and utterly insane, to just utterly insane.   I’m really going to relish the quiet time of this weekend. I recently watched a TV show episode, which featured the importance of small gestures.   I feel starved for romance.   And, I love me some romance.   I mean, who doesn’t dream of the guy that actually comes to your door to pick you up for a date, and who takes your hand when you walk somewhere together, or even the simple act of showing up with a pizza and a bottle of wine after work, when they know that you’ve had a rough day?   I’m not looking for lavish gifts or flowers on the regular, just some thoughtful gestures.   Surprisingly, the person I love did think of me this Valentine’s Day.   He gave me an incredibly thoughtful gift that couldn’t be more me.   And, even more surprisingly, he gave the gift to me a week

This past weekend, as I was trying to decide what I wanted to give up for Lent, I got to thinking about Mardi Gras.  How in the world does a party where people wear masks, flash people for beads, and get drunk have to do with the beginning of Lent?  It turns out that there are festivals held throughout the world similar to mardi gras, specifically in areas with large Roman Catholic populations.  This article was a great read, and provided me with a brief history behind all the debauchery. Happy Mardi Gras!

I think it's both.

I’ve heard of people drinking hot lemon water first thing in the morning, but I was never that interested in trying it.   Chalk it up to being closed minded and in denial about being unhealthy.   In my pursuit to be healthier and an overall better person, I figured I could try something for three weeks.   Why not?   Worst case is that I feel no different and I’ll save money on lemons, right?   In the words of Barney Stinson… Truth is, after drinking hot lemon water first thing in the morning for three straight weeks is that I did feel different.   I noticed a decrease in water weight, an increase in regularity (TMI?), and an increase in my energy level first thing in the morning.   I also think I’ve been relatively healthy this winter and prevented getting sick because of the increase in vitamin C. Plus, it didn’t really add any additional time to my morning routine.   There really is no recipe.   I just squeeze the juice from half a lemon into a mug and add hot water.

It's officially February, and we are one month into 2016.  During January, I completed two challenges that I will eventually touch on, but I want to start some new challenges in February.  For one, I am not going to be the typically single girl on Valentine's Day that curses the day and has a man-hating party.  I intend to embrace my singleness, celebrate the progress I've made in my personal growth goals, and do something nice for myself.  I'm also intent on doing another fitness challenge.  The winter is always more difficult for me because it's so easy to sit inside and eat... everything.  So, I'm going to "Lose the Love Handles" and love myself a little more.  :) <3  Thank you Pinterest and the Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans!