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Lessons + Red Velvet Pound Cake

There was a time, when I used to be very anti-Valentine's Day. I was angry and hurt, because I thought I deserved love from someone special, and I didn’t have that in my life.  I would wear all black, and proudly claim that I don't celebrate Single's Awareness Day.  Oh, if I could only go back to that time!  I would tell myself that no one deserves anything unless they work for it.  And, I needed to work to be good at relationships, no different than I had to work to excel in my school studies, and in my dance classes.  I’m ashamed to say that I spent far too many years thinking that I deserved something I didn't, and I maintained an attitude because I didn’t have it. 

For me, 2016 was all about self-love.  I spent the year doing things I always wanted to do, even if I had to do it by myself, and I’m glad I got to experience that.  I was expecting the man in my life to provide this sense of security (if that’s the right word), and a constant reassurance that I was worth taking the time to do these activities, or travel to certain places.  Truth be told, I can’t rely on someone else to make me happy.  I think that’s an unrealistic expectation.  So, I spent last year treating myself the way I was hoping that a man would.  And, because of that, I spent Valentine's Day indulging in some decadent red-velvet pancakes, while watching T.V. in my sweatpants.

After my year of self-indulgences, I realized that I didn’t really need a good portion of what I thought I needed.  So, this year, I’ve been focusing on others, and how I can treat others better.  Essentially, be a better relationship partner, friend, sister, daughter, and co-worker.  Don’t get me wrong.  I still indulge myself once in a while, but at least I don’t feel like I’m constantly sacrificing my needs, for something or someone else. 

SO…. Because of my newfound outlook on life, I decided to do something for others this Valentine’s Day.  Since I’ve been wanting to try this recipe for red-velvet pound cake for a while now, I figured it would be thoughtful to bring my co-workers a sweet treat! 

I have to admit that I was really nervous about it.  What if people thought that I was weird?  What if no one wanted to eat my dessert?  What if I say the wrong thing when they come over to get a piece of cake?  So many doubts and worries!  But, despite my negative self-talk I persevered.  I brought in the cake, sent out the email for people to come and help themselves, and hopefully I came across polite, and made people feel appreciated.  I really couldn’t have asked for a better day. 





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