Part of being loving, is being kind. However, I always thought about being kind as just doing something nice for someone else. Typically, it would be a friend or family member, and I would use acts of kindness to try to express my love for the other person. What I've come to learn, is that I wasn't entirely accurate in my definition.
Kindness is actually doing something for someone else, who can't do anything for you in return. It's also showing love and care for someone you may not like. It's easy to do good deeds for those that we love, like friends or family, but what if it was your enemy? Kindness is providing someone with something that will change their whole world. And, it is through using compassion that we are able to know what to provide to others in their time of need.
Kindness is also gentle and mild. It is possible to do something nice, but if you do it in a way that is harsh and aggressive, you were not kind. You must be kind to those who do not deserve it. I know that I have used the excuse that because someone else had wronged me, it gave me permission to be cruel. And, that is not what a kind person does.
And, finally, as the old adage goes... you can't love someone else, until you love yourself. You will also treat other people, the same way you treat yourself. I lived in denial of this fact, for a very long time. And, I'm here to say that it's true. If I was critical of myself, I was also critical of others, even though I didn't mean to be. Hence, being kind to yourself is extremely important. By showing yourself kindness, you are also learning compassion, and will be able to understand the needs of others better as well.
I came across something that made the act of kindness make a lot of sense. I'm not a big or strong person. If I was partnered up with someone who was stronger than I am, and we were assigned the task of carrying something heavy, then the weight I would have to lift would be lighter because the other person would be able to carry more weight. Thus, in life, when we are partnered up with someone, what is their experience? Are we lightening their load?
Kindness is actually doing something for someone else, who can't do anything for you in return. It's also showing love and care for someone you may not like. It's easy to do good deeds for those that we love, like friends or family, but what if it was your enemy? Kindness is providing someone with something that will change their whole world. And, it is through using compassion that we are able to know what to provide to others in their time of need.
Kindness is also gentle and mild. It is possible to do something nice, but if you do it in a way that is harsh and aggressive, you were not kind. You must be kind to those who do not deserve it. I know that I have used the excuse that because someone else had wronged me, it gave me permission to be cruel. And, that is not what a kind person does.
And, finally, as the old adage goes... you can't love someone else, until you love yourself. You will also treat other people, the same way you treat yourself. I lived in denial of this fact, for a very long time. And, I'm here to say that it's true. If I was critical of myself, I was also critical of others, even though I didn't mean to be. Hence, being kind to yourself is extremely important. By showing yourself kindness, you are also learning compassion, and will be able to understand the needs of others better as well.
I came across something that made the act of kindness make a lot of sense. I'm not a big or strong person. If I was partnered up with someone who was stronger than I am, and we were assigned the task of carrying something heavy, then the weight I would have to lift would be lighter because the other person would be able to carry more weight. Thus, in life, when we are partnered up with someone, what is their experience? Are we lightening their load?
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