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The Opposite of Spoiled

Depending on the website, I may fall in Gen X or the Millennial generation.  And, since there seems to be no end to the articles on why millennial's are the worst generation so far, I became curious if I had some of the less than favorable millennial traits.  I decided to look at things from a different point of view.  That of a parent.  What would I want to teach my children?  Since children emulate their parents, it was easy to see what I need to change in myself, so that I can be a good role model.  As well as a better daughter, friend, sister, and co-worker.  :) 

The Opposite of Spoiled isn't exactly directed at millennial's, but I figured it might give me some insight into why some kids just come across like spoiled brats, and how parents actually contribute to the issue.  I learned way more than I ever thought I would! 



Teaching our kids about money, is actually a really great way to teach them about values.  What are true needs (place to live, food, clothing) versus wants?  As an adult, where we spend our money shows where are priorities lie.  I've got a friend who pays for a house keeper, so that she can have more quality family time, as opposed to spending time cleaning.  Another, who spends a good deal of money to send her kids to the best schools.  And, yet another, who spends a good portion of her income on food, so that she can cook for her friends.  No one priority is better than the other, they just are what they are.

Armed with my new knowledge, it was time to do a little self-reflection.  For one, I know that I spend a lot of money eating out.  I don't like to cook, and I really don't like to cook for myself.  I'm choosing to pay for convenience.  I'll also spend my money to go out to eat with friends or family, and on trips.  Now, every time I pull out my credit card, I ask myself if what I'm spending my money on, is really in line with my priorities.  Or, is it simply something I'm using to make myself feel good?

The book also made me realize that I don't give back the way I should.  At first, I didn't think that my parents really taught me tithing, but upon further reflection, they did.  It just wasn't in the form of numerous charities.  My parents always contributed to our church's offering, and more times than I can count volunteered their time helping to either coach my sister's softball team, or help sew costumes, take pictures, and sell tickets for my dance recitals.  It was their priority to be a part of my sister's and my life, as much as they could.  So, my second take away, is that I need to find a way to give back.  Unfortunately, I'm currently of the "I've earned it, I'll spend it" frame of mind.  My first order of business, will be to start giving money to my church.

In my opinion, the greatest point that Lieber made was that it doesn't matter if your kid has a lot of material possessions, or not.  Really it comes down to how well the child sees the reality of their situation.  If they realize that they are fortunate, have an appreciation for what they have, and give back to others, then some of the richest kids, can be the most unspoiled.  It all comes back to the values we're teaching our children.

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