Diary of a Spinster and Lunatic

I've spoken before about my struggle with weight recently.  I put on about 10 pounds last summer, and all my usual tricks for taking it off, were no longer working.  I used to be able to just go to the gym and do a day or two of cardio, and I'd be back to my old self.  But, since my last birthday, my metabolism changed.  Damn the aging process! One of my friends from high school became a Beachbody coach, and was always posting motivational things on Facebook about her workouts and her struggles.  Even though my goals aren't all weight related, I loved that I could apply the positive message to whatever I was personally working through.  After I started hitting the like button on a good portion of her posts, she asked if I wanted to join Beachbody.  At first, I was skeptical.  I could save the money, and just go to the gym at my apartment complex, or take advantage of the many free YouTube workout videos out there.  But, since I've been on a mission to experience ne

I can remember feeling weird about telling people I didn't feel like I was good enough, or that I was really worth fighting for.  I felt like if I said that to someone they would think I was only looking for attention or a pity party.  Of course there was the side of me that wanted to be told that wasn't the case, but I recognize now that in a way I wanted to cry out for help.  I desperately didn't want to feel the way that I did.  I wanted to believe that I was worth it. But, instead of working through the issues that would have helped me to get to the place where I believed in myself, I was looking for other people to make me feel like I was worth something.  And, no matter what someone else tells you, you won't truly believe you're worth it, until you personally believe it. Ultimately, it takes not only dealing with your own issues, but pushing yourself to do things you'd never thought you'd do.  Experience is everything.  Combine the drive to learn

This year, I gave up sugar for Lent.  And, I didn't just stop at sweets.  I stopped drinking soda, sugary coffees, energy drinks, protein drinks, and eating barbecue sauce, and ketchup.  I even became diligent about how much sugar there was in the instant soup I was eating for lunches.  At the beginning of the 40 days, I wasn't exactly sure what to expect, what changes my body would experience, or what lessons I was going to learn. What I ended up learning has been so eye opening, and valuable to me.  I now have a better insight into myself, my habits, and my weaknesses.  I also proved to myself that I'm capable of overcoming what holds me back, no matter what it is.  :) By far the biggest thing I learned was that I am an addict.  I am addicted to sugar.  And, when I gave up one addiction, I proceeded to my next addiction, which for me, happened to be cheese.  And, then I discovered something delicious... sugar free JELL-O pudding.  After that, I then gave up cheese

Depending on the website, I may fall in Gen X or the Millennial generation.  And, since there seems to be no end to the articles on why millennial's are the worst generation so far, I became curious if I had some of the less than favorable millennial traits.  I decided to look at things from a different point of view.  That of a parent.  What would I want to teach my children?  Since children emulate their parents, it was easy to see what I need to change in myself, so that I can be a good role model.  As well as a better daughter, friend, sister, and co-worker.  :)  The Opposite of Spoiled isn't exactly directed at millennial's, but I figured it might give me some insight into why some kids just come across like spoiled brats, and how parents actually contribute to the issue.  I learned way more than I ever thought I would!  Teaching our kids about money, is actually a really great way to teach them about values.  What are true needs (place to live, food, clothi

This past week, I really struggled with anger and resentment.   Like everyone, there are experiences from my past that have caused me pain.   And, unfortunately, I let my emotions lead my thoughts to a place of anger, which made me lash out at those around me.       I found that by pausing, and looking for the facts in the situation first, instead of how it made me feel, I was able to immediately calm down.   I can see how the other person was doing what they thought was best, just like I do in many situations that don’t always turn out well.   And, I can also see how my actions contributed to the overall messiness of the situation.   I now, am able to look back, and just take it as a learning experience.   Because, I won’t be letting anyone do those things to me again.      

A s I get older, I find that I feel like I’m running out of time, more and more.   It’s the same panicky feeling I used to get years ago, when I realized I didn’t leave myself enough time to study for an exam.   There are so many things that I want to do and see in my life, that I’ve got this sudden urge to do it all right now.   So, as I come across things I want to do, whether it’s try a new recipe, a new exercise practice, or even trips I want to take, I’m trying to find the time (and money), to do it.   I’ve always wanted to visit the Philadelphia Museum of Art, and even though I’ve lived relatively close most of my life, I’ve never been.   Since I took some vacation time at the end of last month, I decided to use one of those days to drive into the city, and walk through the museum.   I only walked through the main building, but there was so much to take in.   I finally saw a Degas!   And, was even more excited when I realized that his only sculpture - The Little Fourtee

No matter what goal you're working on, it can seem so discouraging when you don't see the results you want, in the time frame you'd like to see it.  In the past, I've given up when I hit some a rough patch in the road, telling myself that it just wasn't meant to be.  I have a quite a few goals on my plate right now, and even though I'm getting discouraged because I'm not seeing results, I'm still moving forward.  I'm refusing to feel sorry for myself.  I'm getting up, and fighting for what I want.  I know that I will only appreciate those things more, by having to work for them.