Diary of a Spinster and Lunatic

We all have those days where you know that before the day even starts, it's going to be a struggle.  A struggle to not only keep focused, but keep your emotions in check, because whatever you're dealing with has got you completely consumed. Today is one of those days for me.  All I can do is stay focused on what needs to be done, and get out of my head.  And, tonight, I am treating myself to a session of self-care and pampering. For those of us who are facing a known challenge today, know that today may not be as bad you think!  Don't just assume that it's going to be bad.  Let's focus on the good things, and good things will happen. :)

Every Friday for the last couple of months, I have treated myself to take-out for dinner.  But, a few weeks ago, as I was sitting in front of the TV, eating my tacos, I realized that I had completely given in to gluttony.  Each week, I had been going to one of my favorite take-out restaurants, purposely ordering more food than I knew I needed (or, rather, what would satisfy me), and came home and ate it all in one sitting.  Afterwards, I felt disgusting.  I was so full that I couldn't even sit up straight on the couch. As embarrassing as this truth is, this experience made me question my actions, and how it was affecting my life.  Gluttony by definition is the over-indulgence or over-consumption of anything to the point of waste.  How many things I was I over-indulging in?  And, because I was over-indulging, what was suffering because of it.  Family?  Friends?  No matter what choice we make, we sacrifice something for it.  If tonight, I make a choice to eat Mexican, then I'm

I've begun a transitional period in my life, and to be honest it's scary.  Really scary.  And, I have no idea what to expect from my future.  Oh, the fear! But, it's time to move forward.  I can't keep sitting and waiting for things to just fall into place.  All I've got is my faith.  Let's see where this leads me.

This past week, I had the pleasure of puppy-sitting my sister's 6 year old yellow lab.  I have to admit that I was extremely nervous, since he and I had never spent an extended period of time alone together.  But, I was determined to make sure that he felt safe, and loved.  We went on at least two or three walks a day.  I took him to the toy store, and to get some whipped cream at my favorite ice-cream place.  On our last day together, I made sure to make turkey bacon for breakfast, just so that he could have a piece. I essentially tried to be the fun aunt, and spoil him rotten.  There was a part of me though, that was anxious for him to go back home because, while he was a joy to have around, he was a lot of work.  And, I couldn't wait to vacuum and dust.  (His blonde hair does not match well with my dark mahogany furniture!)  But, once my sister picked him up, and after I vacuumed and starting putting my world back together, I felt incredibly lonely.  It was so great to hav

It's so easy to fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others.  I can easily get down on myself when I stop to think about what some of my friends have, that I don't.  But, the truth is, that we're all on our own special journey, and are learning, growing, and cultivating our own unique lives.  Stop focusing on what others are doing, and how green their grass is, when you need to be worrying about your own grass.  You'll find this way of thinking to be much more productive!  

 

Part of being loving, is being kind.  However, I always thought about being kind as just doing something nice for someone else.  Typically, it would be a friend or family member, and I would use acts of kindness to try to express my love for the other person.  What I've come to learn, is that I wasn't entirely accurate in my definition. Kindness is actually doing something for someone else, who can't do anything for you in return.  It's also showing love and care for someone you may not like.  It's easy to do good deeds for those that we love, like friends or family, but what if it was your enemy?  Kindness is providing someone with something that will change their whole world.  And, it is through using compassion that we are able to know what to provide to others in their time of need. Kindness is also gentle and mild.  It is possible to do something nice, but if you do it in a way that is harsh and aggressive, you were not kind.  You must be kind to those who

Today, inspire others through your actions !  Wave hello to someone, be kind and compassionate to someone who's having a bad day, listen with the intention of helping others, and lead by example.  Make others want to do what you do.  Pretty soon this world will be an amazing place to live! 

So, call me crazy, but I now look at stress, and being pushed passed my limits as a good thing. Several weeks ago, I had one of those days at work where nothing seemed to be going my way.  My pride took a hit when I needed a more tenured associate to help me with something I felt like I should have been able to handle on my own.  It frustrated and angered me because, as I prepared to go out on vacation, and my co-workers, whom I have backed up numerous times, decided they didn't have time to back me up, but hey... the intern's available!  And, then to top it off, I discovered the promotion I was expecting to receive in July, wasn't going to be happening any time soon. Not.a.good.day. In the past, I would have dragged my ass home, and drowned myself in junk food and wine, and been in a bad mood for days.  Now.... it took less than 24 hours to get back to my old self.  I came to terms with the fact that I couldn't control everything, and that that feeling of stre